11 Things I learned At Tidal Wave

I’ve never been to Tidal Wave but my friend Andy Samples offered to act as a guest writer and give his of the event.

  1. Now that waterproof phone are a thing, a lot of people are on Growlr in the pool. 🐻
  2. The hotel has literally an unlimited amount of fresh, clean, towels. Feel free to get a new one every 20 minutes. there are always more. πŸ˜‰
  3. The sporty gays refer to hooking up with a couple as a 2 point conversion. πŸ‘¬
  4. A lot of people don’t realize how intense Florida sun is and forget to wear sunscreen. We call those people “tomatoes.” β˜€οΈπŸ˜‘
  5. Pool view rooms do offer a an excellent view, but the club music pumping until 2am means you won’t be going to sleep before then. Don’t get a pool view room if you’re a light sleeper who wants to get to bed at a decent hour. 🚫😴
  6. “Come see me in 12 cheeseburgers” is the best rejection line you’ll hear all weekend. β˜ΊοΈπŸ”
  7. Going anywhere on the elevators will take a while but use the opportunity to chat up any cuties who are waiting with you. Close the deal quickly enough and your floor destination may change during the journey up. 😏
  8. Straight people check in on Sunday and the kids get right into the pool, completely unaware that the water their 7 year old is sucking in through her snorkel may contain some additional ingredients. πŸ’¦πŸ˜³
  9. The bathroom at the pool could itself be described accurately as a pool. So wear flip flops. 🌊🚽
  10. Inevitably someone who isn’t your type will latch on to you. The pool is huge and full of bears to flirt with and hide behind, so use this to your advantage to escape. 😎
  11. Don’t use the lobby bathroom at the hotel. πŸ’©πŸ˜–

One thought on “11 Things I learned At Tidal Wave

  1. 1) The lobby bathroom was always clean, smelled good and never had more than one other person in it.

    2) The pool was amazingly clean again every morning unlike the year before.

    3) I’ve never seen so many YOUNG incredibly large guys who in all likelihood will never make it to 50 without a bypass, diabetes and spinal and joint damage.

    4) The older guys had the most fun. They knew to stay out of the sun most of the time or wear a wide brimmed hat, drink liquor AND water and eat a hot dog in more than one gynormous bite.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s