The Pros and Cons of Bear Week

Thousands of bears invade the small Cape Cod town of Provincetown every July for Bear Week. Should you go? There’s no right or wrong answer. It’s all about perspective.

Pro: For one week the streets are infested with so much burly eye candy that your brain is in danger of over heating.

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Con: Bear Week means you’ll have access to thousands of bears from all over the country. But it also means all of those thousands of bears will also be competition for the guy you like. If you’re single or if you want to meet new people you now have Olympic level competition all within a 5 mile radius. Once I had to remind an über hot friend of mine that getting overlooked at a bear run doesn’t always mean you’re ugly. It might simply mean that you are falling victim to an overly saturated market.

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Pro: You get to experience the charm of a small New England beach town. The buildings are full of character and the cozy streets are a picturesque backdrop to your summer vacation.

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Con: If you’re from New England you realize that cozy = tiny and character = old and shitty.

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Pro: Like Europe, if you’re lucky enough to get the chance everyone should experience Bear Week at least once.

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Con: It’s insanely expensive! It will be one of the most expensive vacations you’ll ever take. You seriously can go to Europe for the same price.

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Pro: Most people rent a house for the week so it’s a great trip to plan with a big group of friends.

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Con: You might not be in the mood to share a two bedroom condo with 10 other people.

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Pro: Plenty of places are air conditioned if you want to get away from the heat.

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Con: The air conditioning is probably coming from a single window unit that’s older than the guys under the dick dock.

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Pro: Tea Dance at the Boatslip is the main event at 4:00 pm everyday. Everyone will be there partying with their planters punch.

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Con: Your friends won’t pace themselves with the punch and therefore they’ll be passed out by 9. Be ready to fly solo if you want to stay out late.

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Pro: Bear Week is a common site for gay wedding ceremonies because Massachusetts was the very first state to legalize same sex marriage over a decade before Obergefell v Hodge. Be prepared to attend a ceremony on the beach.

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Con:  Be prepared to attend a ceremony on the beach.

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Pro: Spiritus Pizza is a delicious late night snack.

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Con: All the other 2000 bears know about Spiritus too and it’s the only pizza place in town.

2008

Pro: There are miles of beautiful sandy beaches to enjoy

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Con: The water is ice cold

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When I went to Bear Week I had a great time and I can honestly say that everyone should go at least once. Whether or not you like it enough to spend the money to go back is up to you. Personally I think its overpriced for what it is but that’s just me.

2003

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