I’d Fap To That

As much as we all talk about sex there doesn’t seem to be as many conversations about masturbation. Yes we discuss the fact that we all jerk off but rarely are any details discussed. This is even more surprising because I would suspect most of us pull the pickle more often than have actual sex. In the few conversations I’ve had with people I’ve noticed that many guys have a sort of ritual around fapping. In some cases the ritual has been around since our teenage years and is so ingrained that an orgasm can only happen under very specific circumstances. There are of course others of us who can get off anywhere anyhow.

To help facilitate the conversation I’ll start by telling you a bit about myself:

I can pretty much jerk off anywhere. Lying in bed is by far the most common and a close second would be on the couch (with my laptop). However I’ve also jerked off in my car, outside in the backyard, and in the shower. This probably sounds creepy but I’ve also jerked off in public places. A public bathroom is the easiest but by far not the only place I’ve choked the chicken. Also I should mention it’s not really the trill of getting caught as much as just the horny need to cum. I’m also skilled at doing it incredibly discreetly.

If it’s during the week I usually beat my meat at night right before I go to sleep or on my lunch break at work. If it’s the weekend or a day off it’s usually in the morning when I wake up. However on a boring day off I can go several times throughout the day. For me a super full and bloated stomach is probably this biggest road block to waxing the candle. 

 How often?
I average about 7 times a weak. I wouldn’t say once a day because some days maybe one or none and other days could be 3 or 4. The more free time I have the more time I can devote to jacking off. The days I don’t jack off are the days that are the absolute busiest. Lately I’ve been stroking in much more often to avoid rando hook ups.

The answer to this might seem obvious but I wanted to touch on it anyway. I use my right hand, laying or sitting and I never with lube. If I’m not super horny and I try to spank it with my left hand it could take hours. I definitely lack ambidexterity in my pole polishing and lube requires too much clean up when it’s only a party of one. For me lying down or sitting up is the most conducive to cumming but I can also get off standing if I’m horny enough. I’ve had friends tell me that body position is the most ingrained part of their routine. One friend told me he can only do it lying down while another friend in college told me when he was younger he could only get off while kneeling.

To What?
Personally I usually use a combination of both porn and thoughts. Porn pictures, like the ones on Tumblr, are a great way for me to get things going however I usually will end up finishing to a thought in my head. A hot porn video is more likely to work without the need for my mind. I strongly prefer amateur Xtube style videos of real situations over professional porn. Professional porn is always a bit too perfect and feels mechanical. Although they are hard to find, a good porn comic strip or written story can get me harder than any picture. With all that said, mental thoughts, scenarios, and memories usually always come into play whether alone or in conjunction with any of the above mention material.

How do you wank your willie?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s