Yes I’m Judging You

We all judge people unfairly. Most people assume they are being judged by petty things like weight or dance ability. I’d argue that we or at least I give generous allowances for those things. However I do tend to be much more judgmental about much more trivial things. Here are the ways I know I judge people despite knowing better. To be crystal clear, I know judging people for these reasons is wrong but I can’t help it. Admitting I have a problem is the first step toward change.

Taking too long at ATM– He’s not programing the CIA’s super computer, why is he taking so long?! Get the cash and move the on. If his transaction is that complicated he should’ve gone into the fucking bank.

Car bras– Why? I mean… just why?

Wearing Teva scandals- They are comfortable and practical and literally the ugliest piece of foot wear on earth. I instantly assume anyone wearing Teva scandals are real life version of Ned Flanders. 

Ability to use technology– Fact: Many people, especially of an older generation, can have huge amounts of knowledge and experience despite being bad with computers.Truth: If I have to tell him how to send an email I am going to naturally assume I have to remind him to go to the bathroom to avoid a kindergarten style accident.

Not financially self sufficient– Everyone goes through rough patches where they need help. It’s entirely different when he graduated college 5 years ago and his parents are still paying his credit card bills.

Driving with your signal light on– When he forgets to turn off his signal light I judge him. Harshly. The amount of times I wish for his spontaneous combustion is in direct proportion to how long the light stays on. 

Vegans– I know there are health reasons for going vegan but it still sounds ridiculous. In an end-of-the-world style survival of the fittest competition Vegans will be the first to lose. Plus, why do they always looks so sad and sickly?

Triads– I’ll be honest, I judge the original couple much more then the young third they welcome in. I can’t help but think they’re leading that impressionable young cub on with their gay midlife crisis.

Expensive Car– When he pulls up in his new Mercedes Benz S63 AMG I say “That’s a beautiful care” but I’m really thinking “Douche.”

Wearing a lock around your neck– It’s unfair but when I see a padlock around someone’s neck I associate it will bullshit and drama. When he says, “You must ask Sir’s permission before talking to me.” I say, “Where did that triad go? They were fun.”

Saying “I never judge anyone“- I have nothing to talk to you about.

4 thoughts on “Yes I’m Judging You

  1. 1) Just because you're in a hurry doesn't mean they are. Maybe they work nights and can only do their banking via ATM.

    2) Car bras? Why the aversion to them? Why not?

    3) I was gonna say something cutting about this one but hey, I judge crocs. I'd love to say yours is more judgmental but I'd be lying, judgmental is judgmental. Okay we both lose here. 🙂

    4) I used to judge those who were technologically inept. Then I met a brain surgeon who didn't know how to connect to the internet. Let me just take back all those thoughts about how stupid you were…

    5) Not financially self sufficient. I'm of two minds here. Student loans (especially in Canada) are insane. Many graduates live with their family to save money before moving out (again). It sucks, but there you go. On the other hand, debt you take on is YOUR debt, your parents should not be paying your CC bills.

    6) No comment. I don't drive, so never experienced this. My brother would be right with you squirting the lighter fluid to make sure the burn is nice and hot though. Me, I'd wonder how they could drive without that annoying 'ping ping ping' not driving them batshit nuts.

    7) Vegans: Have you seen a slaughterhouse? I don't blame them at all for being against the meat industry. I even agree with them…but not enough not to eat meat. lol

    8) Triads? Hot.

    9) Car? Meh. No judging, but I couldn't care less either.

    10) Locks? Hot.

    11) I think it's safe to say we all judge at least a bit. 😉


  2. Fuckwad, I said nothing that needs hiding from. I said nothing insulting, admitted to being judgmental myself, and I wasn't talking to you or about you. If you're so goddamn sensitive that my post offends you, then take the pea out from under your mattress and invest in some boxers, because your panties are obviously too tight for you.

    (In case you didn't get it, THAT was an insult)

    For the record, not posting with my name was an oversight, not my intention. I had to hurry up and rushed through the second half, so forgot to sign. My name is Steve, and I'm from Toronto. There, the important people in this blog–that being the blogger–know who I am.

    (Yes, that was another insult.)

    I could go on here, about what your intentions in this bitchfest were, or what you thought you would accomplish with your rant, or what might have possessed you to turn a calm, reasonable discussion into an off-the-rails ragewar, but you're just not worth the effort and I have more important things to do–my nails need a trim. I do hope you get laid soon, you obviously need it.


  3. Hahahahaha! Best response ever!! You got me, I WAS trying to start a “rage war.” Apparently I have succeeded! Thank you for finding the time between all your sex in random bookstores to reply with three paragraphs even though I'm not worth the effort! Appreciated!! P.S. If you have to tell someone you're insulting them, you're doing it wrong…


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