Stoners: A Love Story

Some attraction is very conscious and obvious. For example, if your belly peaks out from under the bottom of your shirt I’m going to take notice. I also love when I can see your butt crack. That’s something I am consciously aware of. However some parts of attraction are a lot less conscious. They are the qualities that drawn you toward a particular man. Let me explain what I mean: Picture you are at a bar and you are introduced to a group of hot guys from out of town. Objectively they all have similar traits of being husky, bearded, shaved head, and broad shoulders. However for some reason you are naturally more attracted to Bear X over his friends Bear Y and Bear Z. What’s that unspoken attraction or quality? This post is dedicated to one of my (many) unconscious attractions.

When I was in high school I had a major crush on straight boy. Come one, we’ve all been there. His name was Tony and he was a year ahead of me. I swooned the first time I saw him my freshmen year and the crush lasted until he graduated three years later. He had chin length hair that he would tuck behind his ears while wearing anything that didn’t look too new. He may have been in the band and he definitely didn’t play sports. He was a stoner. Unbeknownst to me he would lay the pattern for a life long unconscious attraction to stoners.

Why do I like them so much? I’m not totally sure. There’s just something about them that I’ve always been drawn to. If I had to guess I assume its their relaxed easy going nature and their love of a good time with friends. Plus they’re almost always in a good mood! That’s a great combo. Happy and relaxed are at absolute top of my (unconscious) attraction list. Who wants to fuck the nervous jittery guy? Or the hot chubby guy who looks lifeless and miserable all the time? No thank you. I actually know a guy who is super cute with an amazing body but I don’t think I have ever seen him smile. Even at the funnest parties he looks like his dog just died. That kills so much of my attraction. (I’m not saying I’d push him away… but you get the idea) Give me a chubby Seth Rogen any day of the week.

“I thought you didn’t smoke?”

Yes, that’s correct. I don’t smoke weed. As I’ve said in the past, whether its cigarettes or weed I have nothing against smoking. Its just not for me. A lot of that is because the actual act of breathing in smoke is very unappealing to me. Yuk. Now if you baked weed into some delicious brownies or cookies… we may be able to make a deal.

P.S. If you ever want to get on my good side, feed me first. A full belly is a happy belly.

P.P.S I never know whether to call it pot or weed. I always think I’m saying the wrong one and outing myself as terrible uncool.

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