Joy and Pain

Reflecting on Thanksgiving

I went home to Connecticut for Thanksgiving to spend quality time with my family. It was a wonderfully delicious dinner filled with turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie, gravy, and more. My sister even stayed over for a night so we could all be under one roof again. I even got some couch time with the pugs. It was like old times as they fell asleep and snored on my lap. Spending the weekend with my parents and sister gave me the opportunity to recharge my battery. In the past I have never cared much for holidays but this year I couldn’t have been happier to be home. I didn’t even mind sleeping on a cheap blow up mattress. It was one of the best Thanksgiving I can remember with my family. 
My weekend was bitter sweet though. While I was back in the northeast I wanted to try and spend as much quality time with friends as I did with family. Unfortunately I was let down. Everyone has a life and things always come up. But I thought they would want to see me as much as I wanted to see them. I thought I was more important then bull shit. Bull shit won. I was not naive assuming that everyone would drop their holiday plans at a second’s notice. In fact, I tried to get the ball rolling back in September. I knew Thanksgiving weekend would be the best opportunity for quality time so I made a post on Facebook so my visit could be worked into schedules. As the weeks and months went by I also dropped reminder text messages to keep the thought fresh in mind. The response I got was pitiful. I don’t like to pull out the ‘distance card’ a lot, but I do in  fact live 1500 miles away now and I thought my return home would be met with a bit more celebration. It was one of those small moments in life where you see a person’s true nature. 
As I flew home Saturday night I was surprised at how relieved I was to be coming back to Dallas. I missed Dallas and I missed my boyfriend. I knew in my heart I had made the correct decision to move. I was also tremendously angry and disappointed for feeling like I had to beg a person to spend time with them. It’s an awful feeling when you have to beg. But life moves on and changes. I will choose to remember the great times of past and not the douche bag moments of the present.
One a finale note, I do not want the actions of a few to taint the actions of the many. Not everyone in Connecticut let me down. On Wednesday night I was able to catch up (even if just briefly) with a lot of good people. 


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s