Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey

I have a lot of ideas and thoughts that are interesting but not strong enough to fill a whole blog post. Here are some of my random thoughts:

1. You may already have a Bucket List of life changing goals you want to one day accomplish. But I doubt you have a Minor Bucket List. A MBL is a list of frivolous goals you’d like to do before you die. Minor items could include beating a new video game or finding the perfect jock strap.  Here are some of the items on my Minor Bucket List:

-Go Titty Bar. I’m curious to see what a female strip club is like.
-Have someone write a “missed connection” on Craigslist about me
-Have a date/kiss for midnight on New Years Eve

2.Shopping Tips: Buy clothes in August. Starting now, many clothing stores put their summer merchandise on clearance to make way for back to school season. Get to the stores now while the sale sections are filled with good options in your size. You can get some great deals buying at the end of the season. Also check a store’s website for additional colors and sizes. The other bonus of August is that later in the month many states have a tax free shopping week. Hint: don’t try and double dip your saving by trying to buy clearance during tax free week. By the time tax free week comes along much of the quality clearance items will be gone.

3. Kristin Stewart has no taken Meg Ryans place on my “I hate you for no reason” board. I’ve never liked Kristen Stewart mainly because she always has a disinterested stink face on. Now comes the news that she cheated on her boyfriend Robert Patenson with a married man. Thank you KS, now I have a legitimate reason to hate you. (Meg Ryan had the same story line with Russell Crow and Dennis Quaid)

4. If you enjoy watching gymnastics at the Olympics, you’ll remember 1996 in Atlanta when the US women won the team gold metal. It was the year of Kerri Strug’s famous vault. It’s her team mate Shannon Miller who got my attention recently though. Miller is one of the most decorated US female gymnast of all time. I was shocked to see a current picture of her. With a short brown bob she looks unrecognizable! When NBC interviewed her my first thought was, “Who the hell is she?” Shocking but a big improvement. It also looks like she got her teeth done. Thumbs up.

5. I saw Batman: The Dark Knight Rises. It was good, but my only suggestion is that you watch Batman Begins first. I missed Batman Begins and therefore was a little lost during some parts of the movie. If you missed the first installment like me, you’ll still be able to follow the movie as a whole. There are just some back stories you’ll miss.
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3 thoughts on “Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey

  1. Are you aware of the fact that it was Dennis Quaid who cheated on Meg Ryan for many many years? Sorry, but I'm not going to blame her for having her revenge with Crowe after being cheated on for so long! You shouldnt either.

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  2. Sigh… as I've said many times before I don't know any of the details of Meg's relationship w/ Quaid. More importantly I don't care. That's the entire point! I disliked her (and Kristen Stewart) for no reason. Their hint of making even the smallest mistake gave me a quasi legit reason for my distaste. If it were any other person I wouldn't give a shit. I've fucked a married man! The entire point of the whole post is that I really don't have a legitimate reason. So to all the Meg Ryan super fans out there, I don't care if she was cheated on. I still don't like her.

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