I’m a great gift giver. Not to toot my own horn… but Toot Toot! Because of budget, having a small family, and other factors, I only buy presents for my sister and parents. I miss coming up with thoughtful gifts for people so I decided to create a celebrity holiday gift list. If these celebs were in my life, here is what my shopping list would look like:
Oprah: Designing Women Season 1 on DVD. Oprah’s OWN network is struggling. Every show is inspirational and thought provoking. BORING! Give me simple funny comedies. Cable networks survive on reruns and Oprah needs to jump on the band wagon. I suggest Designing Women and Murphy Brown.
|Singita Grumeti Reserves|
Kim Kardashian: A month long vacation at the Singita Grumeti Reserves in Tanzania. I like Kim K and the family, but they have suffered from over exposure. Let’s be honest, the public is sick of them. She needs to get out of the spot light for a while. No cameras allowed.
Michelle Bachmann: A heterosexual man to love and care for her. That women needs a man to bend her over and fuck her brains out.
Will Smith: A year subscription to HungLatinoBoyz.com. Enough said.
Adele: A Turtledove Crystal Britannaia Skull Clutch from Alexander McQueen. Adele is a super star now and I’d love to see her step out with and edgy style. My ideal look for her is classic British style with a twist.
Lea Michelle: Humility
Angelina and Brad Pitt: A fake donation to the charity of their choice. They have everything, I’m not spending any of my money.
Charlie Sheen: A trany hooker with a hidden camera. I think it’s time he had a sex tape.
Beyonce and Jay Z: A sequin ruffled hooded sweat shirt for the new baby.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: A blow job. Trust me, it’s the only thing he wants.
Osama Bin Laden: Oops you’re dead. What’s hell like?
Occupy Protestors: A shower and a shave. I totally support your right to protest and stand up for what you believe in. With that said, you’ve slept in a tent for 2 month… it’s time for a nice steam shower with some lavender body wash.
Question: What was on the walls of your childhood bedroom?
I don’t know a thing about football other then it’s the sport that has some of the sexiest athletes. Their bodies are so thick and juicy with tight pants that hug their asses and form fitting shirts that show off every fabulous curve of their bellies. Key Words: Football, Sexy, Meaty, Precum, Spank Bank, Bellies, Thickness, No Neck, Muscle Gut, Bent Over, Ass Slap, Beefy, I Can’t Stop Starring At Your Butt, Kris Dielman should be naked all the time.
I like to think of myself as someone who’s on top of trends. Although I can’t take credit or claim to be the first Adele fan, I definitly was ahead of the curve. (I first posted about the release of her album 21 it back on March 6th) I became an instant fan of hers 2 years ago after hearing her debut album 19 in the car coming home from a party with my friend Randy. If you haven’t heard American Glory it’s an amazing song. The world finally caught up with me and Randy and fell in love with Adele in 2011. 21 is the first album to be the number in both CD and digital sales. Rolling in the Deep, the first single, is the best selling song of the year. It’s the first single to sell 5 million copies in 14 years. 14 YEARS! (the last being Elton John’s Candle in the Wind in 1997) Her second single, Someone Like You also ended the year in the top 25.
If you don’t like shea butter, L’Occitane has a lot of other unique gifts. Product categories include Lavender, Olive, Verbena, Almond, and Cade. visit: usa.loccitane.com
|Shea Butter Hand Cream|
|Shea Butter Soaps|
|Cade (Men’s) Collection|
|Almond Body Scrub|
|Shea Butter Food Cream|
|Olive Face Cleanser|