If you want to get on board with this trend, here are some suggestions to finding your second soul mate:
-You already have a partner to fall back on, so for boyfriend #2 try something new. Take inspiration from the Paris runways and go ethnic. Asians are always sleek and sophisticated and Brazilians are notoriously good at Jenga.
-Look far and wide. Over half of the triads I know have a member who are or were out of state. Why not plan ahead and snag a man in your favorite vacation destination such as Hawaii. That way you’ll have a free place to stay next year.
-Guys named Trevor are the best gardners while men named Butch are the best in bed. Choose accordingly.
I sollute the gay pioneers of love and sex. One day Facebook will recognize your union(s) and allow multiple relationship status picks.
Today is the One Year Anniversary of the Gay Gasp. It just occurred to me now that my anniversary date is 10/10/10. The funny thing is that I can’t remember if I did that on purpose or if it was a divine mistake. We’ll just say it was on purpose. My first year has been a successful one. I love that you enjoy reading my rambling and I’ll continue to try and keep it new and interesting. Call it a gay cliché but part of my inspiration was Carrie Bradshaw’s column on Sex and the City. This blog is my version of magazine column. A bit of fashion, sex, observation, and life experience hopefully done in an amusing way.
*I’d like to give a special thank you to my friends Stan, Steve, and Justin. You were there for me and answered my calls. It means a lot to me.
If you had to create a soundtrack for your life, what songs would be on it? I created my list last night at 3am when I couldn’t sleep. Some of the songs remind me of a specific time in my life (Pink) while others are tunes I used to be obsessed with (Blur). It was also fun to take a trip down music memory lane… I haven’t listened to 10,000 Maniacs in decades!
Joe’s Life Soundtrack:
Tori Amos- Cornflake Girl
Whitney Houston- Same Script Different Cast
Whitney Houston- I Have Nothing
10,000 Maniacs- Because the Night
Gwen Stefani- What You Waiting For
Pink- Glitter in the Air
Blur- Great Escape
Filter- Hey Man Nice Shot
The Cranberries- Zombie
Imperial Teen- You’re One
Deborah Cox- Absolutely Not
Lady Gaga- Bad Romance
Lady Gaga- Paparazzi
Rihanna- Only Girl in the World,
Rihanna- Don’t Stop the Music
Hole- Miss World
India Arie- Video
Kelly Rowland (w/David Guetta)- When Love Takes Over
Missy Elliot- 4 My People
Florence and the Machine- Dog Days Are Over
Adele- Hometown Glory
Adele- Rolling in the Deep
Madonna- Like a Prayer
Madonna- Hung Up
The Nanny: Fran gets a call from a black women claiming to be her real mother
Golden Girls: Sophia’s long time friends claim Dorothy and Gina where switched at birth
The Nanny: C.C.’s father gets Fran on the game show and she wins
Golden Girls: Dorothy tries out for Jeopardy but doesn’t make it on
Plot: The Sperm Bank
The Nanny: Fran is think about having a baby on her own
Golden Girls: Blanche’s daughter visits Miami and wants a baby
Plot: Childhood nanny back in town
The Nanny: Maxwell’s childhood nanny pays a visit
Golden Girls: When Blanche’s father dies, her childhood nanny come back to town
Plot: In love with a thief
The Nanny: Fran is purposed to by man who later steals jewelry as they are ring shopping
Golden Girls: At Blanche’s Midnight Madness party, a british man steals her necklace
Plot: Held up at gun point
The Nanny: Fran and Sylvia are held hostage at a bank
Golden Girls: The girls are held up at Rose’s office before Christmas
Plot: Sister moves in
The Nanny: Fran’s sister moves in to cook while Niles is away
Golden Girls: Dorothy’s sister comes to Miami when she looses all her money
Plot: The pen pal
The Nanny: Val and Fran’s long time pen pal comes to New York
Golden Girls: The convict Blanche has been writing to gets out of prison
Plot: The boyfirend hits on her best friend
The Nanny: Val’s new boyfriend makes a pass at Fran and they get into a fight
Golden Girls: Dorothy’s doctor boyfriend hits on Blanche and they get into a fight
Plot: Feuding Family
The Nanny: Sylvia and her sister Aunt Rita haven’t talked because a fight at a party
Golden Girls: Sophia’s sister Angela comes to Miami and to continue their fight (which started at a party)
Plot: Date with a highschool classmate
The Nanny: Fran goes on a date with an old classmate who threatens to kills himself
Golden Girls: Dorothy goes out with the man who stood her up for her junior prom
Plot: Moving Out
The Nanny: Fran and Val move into an apartment in a gay building
Golden Girls: Rose moves out after a near death experience
Plot: Unclaimed Baby
The Nanny: Fran kidnaps a women’s baby my mistake on the subway
Golden Girls: A baby is left at the house after a marathon
Plot: Heart Attack
The Nanny: Niles becomes a pest when after his heart attack
Golden Girls: Stan moves in and takes advantage after his heart surgery
Archie– Archie can be described in one word: Tongue. His tongue doesn’t really fit in his mouth. Even when he’s sleeping, it hangs out onto the pillow. This also is the reason why he’s most people’s favorite. Archie was the runt of his liter and therefore has a small head, big paws, and an over abundance of thick fluffy fur. His nickname is “Piggy” or “the Pigman.” Unlike Fitzy, Archie is the most relaxed and easy going of all the dogs. You can almost imagine him like a stoner. The Seth Rogan of pugs. The only thing he wants is a soft pillow to lay on and a belly rub. He’ll sit for hours on end if you rub and scratch him. His other quirk is his nightly routine. Every night he walk about 4 laps around our apartment with a stuffed toy in his mouth whimpering and crying. It’s hysterical to watch.
Doug– Doug is the youngest and just coming out of his puppy phase. He still wants to be chased and play catch. Doug annoys the hell out of me sometimes. With Sara or anyone else, he’ll sit down and relax on the couch and behave. With me it’s a different story. He can never relax because he’s so excited to sit on my lap. He’ll literally stand on all fours and try to attach my face with his tongue. And he never gets tired of it…ever. Like Fitzy and I, Doug has grown to love my mother. When Sara brings them over for a visit, it’s usually a struggle to get him to leave.
They love to sleep under a blanket. If you are sitting on the couch, one of them will come over and start to scratch at you thigh or waist. This is their way of telling you that they want you to put a blanket on your lap so they can sleep underneath it. No kidding.